REJECTION!

As someone wise once said, 'There is no such thing as rejection.  If you did not have an agent before you sent out the query and you do not have an agent after sending out the query, then your condition did not change.  You are no worse off.

I would like to offer this as a 'Form' rejection.  Agents, publishers, et al., please take note.  Copy and paste where ye may:

We have read your manuscript with boundless delight.  If we were to publish your paper, it would be impossible for us to publish any work of a lower standard.  And, as it is unthinkable that we shall see its equal in the next hundred years, we are, to our regret, compelled to return your divine composition and beg you a thousand times to overlook our short sight and timidity.

Yours sincerely.